5 things You Can Do To Diffuse Anger in Homeschool

    I LOVE homeschooling (see my previous blog).  There are times however, when I wonder, "Why am I doing this to myself?"   Usually these moments arise when one child argues, cries, or complains about the work assigned, or just plain lies down and refuses to do it.  What do you do then?!  I understand that this is what parents mean when they say things like, "Better you than me!" or "I could never homeschool my strong willed child!"  Well, I won't say it's easy, but it is DOABLE if approached in the right frame of mind.

  There are some things you can do when tensions run high in homeschool.

1.  Pray, pray, pray!
     Of course, this should be an ongoing thing in everyone's life, especially the homeschool mom!  I pray for patience, direction, MORE patience, and wisdom.

2.  Take a moment to cool off.
    My statement to said child is, "Either you can go and lie down on your bed, or you can get back to work."  If the child is truly beside themselves, lying down will do wonders for them-- they may even fall asleep!  A nap mid-day is great if the frustration is due to being over-tired.  If my child says, "NO!" to either choice, "Then no computer or TV time today".  Sometimes she chooses to work again, sometimes to rest.  Don't make lying down a punishment, just an option that they can choose.

3.  Re-assess the situation.
    After the initial emotions have cooled off, ask what is causing the problem?  Is a younger sibling causing distractions in the background?  Do they need a snack or drink?  Is this assignment frustrating because they don't understand it?  Try to decide how to solve the root problem. 
    This is HOMEschool, not public school at home.  You can go over the lesson again (and again, and again) until they understand; break it down into smaller, manageable parts; assign only a few problems out of the page to see if they understand; or skip that subject or lesson entirely until later that day or next week or next month.

4. Ask for help!
    When I'm at my whit's end, my husband is a wonderful support.  There are certain subjects that one child refuses to study with me because she doesn't like the way I explain it-- only Daddy will do for those subjects.  Be willing to recruit family and friends to come and help when needed.
    Also, don't be to ask for professional help if it's needed.  Like me, you probably didn't study education in school and can't be expected to know everything about child development and issues in education. 

5.  Keep it in perspective.
    How is your over-all relationship with your child?  If good, then don't let frustration in school change that.  If it's suffering, spend extra time to develop a strong relationship with them.  The facts learned in school are important, but the relationships developed with God and our families are more important.