First of all, I never thought I'd be a homeschool mom, or at least I never really thought about it. Even when our family went to the mission field in 2005 with a three year old and a 9 month old, the question never really bothered me much. When our oldest was four, we put her into a nice, Christian pre-school. I even worked there one day a week for about a year. We planned to put her into one of the International schools that are in Arusha when she was old enough for Kindergarten.
*Then we looked at their prices*
That was the first clue that I had that we would be homeschooling our kids. We just could not afford to send our kids to the International school, as nice of a school as it was. It was during this time that I felt a distinct calling to stay home with the kids and not be as involved with ministry for the time being. Before this time, I was just as involved as Bill, and had a nanny to care for the kids. But, this was a definite turning point for me, and I started to see raising the kids as my main focus.
We ended up taking furlough before our oldest started Kindergarten, so she entered public school for the first half of Kindergarten. Then, when we pulled her out half way through the year to return to Tanzania, we took the workbooks from her school with us. That was all I knew to do, was to finish up the workbooks that the school gave us.
*We have made many mistakes in homeschooling.*
I was so unprepared and really had no clue that first year. I would just pull out her workbooks sometime during the day and have her do a few pages. There was no consistency and she took affront to that. Going into first grade, I actually ordered a complete curriculum, Abeka, if you want to know. Another mistake I made was that I pushed her too hard, and created unneeded stress in our homeschool. I would make her sit and struggle to read one page of her reader, with tears in her eyes because she just was so frustrated-- for up to TWO HOURS-- when the recommended time was for 20 minutes a day. Looking back, why didn't I just do the 20 minutes, and then move onto something else, regardless of whether or not she finished the whole page?
Then, due to expecting our third child, we returned to America the second half of first grade and we put her back into public school half way through the school year, and she had to learn an entirely new phonics system. This, I am sure, slowed down her mastery of reading, as she struggled to figure out this new phonics system being taught in the school.
We returned to Tanzania, and started homeschool again, this time with our second daughter starting K4, and also with a new baby. Our oldest was starting second grade. I began to try new things with her such as letting her jump on the trampoline during her flashcards, writing on a wipe off board, and in general not acting like we were having public school at home but having HOMEschool. One negative of this time, was that I returned to America with our baby for a month for medical reasons, leaving the two girls with Bill and his parents who were visiting. The girls, especially the oldest, felt abandoned and the negative results lasted for years. It literally took about two years for the anger and resentment from that to fade away. If I had the slightest inkling how hard it was going to be for the girls for me to leave them for a month, I NEVER would have gone. I would have found another way, somehow.
About a year after this, we were suddenly uprooted from our country, and had to make a move up to Kenya. We lived there for about a year. Even though this was an extremely stressful time for us, as we felt removed from our area of ministry, and friends, it was a very healing time for our family. We went from having Bible studies or discipleship meetings 5 nights a week to.....NONE. We were basically just around each other all day, everyday. It was during this time that I started an important ritual in our family- "special time". Each day, I would spend about 30 minutes alone with each child doing something together like taking a walk, coloring, doing a puzzle, or baking. This ritual is still a very important part of our day.
We returned to Tanzania, and about a year after that, we took another furlough back to America. It had been three years since our last time in America. We decided to put the two girls into public school. I won't say that it was a mistake, because they both had positive experiences. But, due to changes in public schooling (Common Core), I don't think we'll be putting them into public school again. I wanted them to have a public school experience, and they actually had a great one. We also needed a break from each other. We spent most of our time in homeschool fighting. I really needed to take a year off.
This year, back in Tanzania again, I have been trying to back off of my oldest daughter, and letting her take the lead in her education, now that she is in middle school. I am trying to learn from my mistakes, and to not make the same ones again. Next year, I am not even going to use the same curriculum for her, but am ordering from a different company for each subject. For the first time in 6 years, I feel like I'm starting to feel confident as a homeschooling mom.
Over all, here as some lessons I hope you can learn from my mistakes and some positives from my experience I hope you can learn from as well.
Mistakes:
Being unprepared, not researching homeschooling but just falling into it
Pushing too hard, creating unneeded stress instead of going at my child's pace
Switching phonics systems when she was learning to read
Arguing with my daughter to do her school work instead of finding ways to make it fun and exciting
Positives:
Feeling that God was calling me to this, that this was my purpose for this time of my life
Feeling that God was calling me to this, that this was my purpose for this time of my life
Learning to loosen up, not having to act like public school at home, but having fun with it
Spending time alone with each child everyday in "special time"
Letting my child take the lead in her education
Learning to let the older children teach the younger children
Allowing children to learn and grow at their own pace, and to focus on their strengths not weaknesses
Learning to let the older children teach the younger children
Allowing children to learn and grow at their own pace, and to focus on their strengths not weaknesses
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